For Gonzo

Why don't I feel ok to be me?
Why did I delete that line the first time I wrote it?
I think you convinced me that I am weird
You told me a plethora of times, but I never got the memo
Then I found like minds
I still feel insecure
Will the lines rhyme?
Can they feel me as I bear my soul?
Probably not.
To you these are the useless meanderings of a lost soul
At best, a terrorist
To me, I am me
Simple, aesthetic, and counter-cultural me.

I don't want to be like you
I want to make speeches, paint walls, and bring others down:
I want you to be like me
Free.
Well as free as you let me be
Which isn't that free
I don't believe in America
I don't believe in progress
and because I do not talk like you, dress like you, paint like you, sing like you, write like you
smoke like you, tear my family apart like you, keep secrets like you, you make me feel ashamed
“He is no Picasso”
Damn straight! And he is no me
“His work is languid and full of angst”
Your work is boring, monotonous, and inhuman.
You should be trying to impress me
Yet here I am
Sitting in a dark room
alone
Wondering what you think of me

Do not pity me America
For I pity you
our hopes and dreams do not rest in the wallets of the CEO's and Presidents
They are carried forward on the hands and knees of those you demoralized
Again, the slave carries the burden of us all!
But we look just enough like you that we hide in plain sight
Some rebel
Some shrink
Some kill themselves
Kick a puppy long enough and he starts to think he deserved it
I am not your bitch
I am the Da Vinci of my universe and you a Medici-mind of mine

Why am I different?
Because I believe in something other than profits, money, wars, cars, dinners, sex, success, clothes, and celebrity?
I feel outside because I am
and, honey, the weather is fine
Come,
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